My Role Model | Week 2
This was a hard choice but my role model is Jocie Valencia. It's so strange that out of everything and anything I found her on a social media platform, Instagram. I'm pretty sure I found her through a plus size model called Isabel Hendrix whom I also super love but I'll save it for another day.
Anyone who knows me would know that I love dolls, especially paintings of them. I also love to doodle eyes everywhere and anywhere and also anytime. So when I came across Jocie, I immediately fell in love with her works. As pictured it's all amazingly and beautifully detailed. I'm very bad with acrylics or just painting in general and I was amazed at how those mediums that I hated could turn into an incredible masterpiece.
I was envious of course. When would I be able to do something amazing like that? All I can draw is illustrations of the weirdest things and portraits, which I never colour because I suck at it.
One day when I was scrolling down her Instagram page I found this.
"Depression will do different things to different people; for me it changes everything, It changes what I want to wear, the music I want to listen to, the colors I want to surround myself with and the people I want to talk to. This time it also changed my artwork, seeing them side by side it looks like two different artists, because sometimes I feel like two different people. Although I'm feeling much better today, I'm glad I allowed myself some time to get to know myself because I learned so much, and the progress I made overnight with my artwork is so unreal to me. Sometimes I feel like I'll always go back in forth between these two people but I think as long as I have my art and my family it'll be ok."
Then I came to realised that there's always a process to everything and that was her process and she succeeded. Having depression changed her artwork from something simple into something really beautiful. Then it hit me, she's only human. (Cue Christina Perri's Human) That she was not some magical creature who could just suddenly drew and paint so well. What she wrote though, hit home.
I've been through depression too, and it definitely changed the way I drew. I'm not sure if I've overcame it yet but I'm sure I'll get there like she did and get on her level. I seldom talk about what I've been through but coming to realisation definitely helped me. I could turn pain into art and that's why it has always and always been my escape from reality. I didn't draw for awhile especially in my darkest days. In fact I didn't want to do anything at all, I only wanted to curl up and not exist anymore. I think I got over at least half of that obstacle though, I grew up. I started drawing again especially recently and started building up my self confidence.
But back on the topic, I saw her in a new light and I wanted to become her. I wanted to be as good as her. I wanted to have her confidence. I wanted to overcome depression like she did. I'm not there but I will get there. Someday I will.
Thus, she's my role model. Thank you Jocie.
xxx
P/S: My recreations of her artworks will be on the next post.
0 comments: